grateful

I've had a bad morning. My husband is gone. Out of town working. I'm trying to be a single mom to three kids. One who has been up every night, every two hours, for the past week. He's teething and I know it doesn't feel good. One child who is in the midst of her terrible twos and can throw one heckuva temper tantrum. At a moments notice. From smiling to screaming in a millisecond.  One who is a pre-teen and wants to debate my every single word. 

I actually cried this morning from feeling so overwhelmed.

So I decided I needed a new perspective. The baby went down for a nap. I sat outside on my back porch and enjoyed a cup of coffee. In a cup that is adorned with artwork from my pre-teen. I am so grateful for her. She is doing exactly what she is supposed to do. To challenge me. To learn what her own thoughts and opinions are. To pull away from me a little. It hurts sometimes, but I am so proud of who she is. 

I thought about my sweet baby boy. Who would I be without him? He is healthy and for the most part a happy little boy. Teething is hard. I know this. He is almost 5 months old now. He actually has full on belly laughs. And he is LOUD! He loves to be down on the floor and roll all around. He's growing so fast everyday. He's my last baby and I want to enjoy every moment of his baby-ness.

I thought about my husband. I know he doesn't want to be gone. Away from us. But it's part of the job. And I understand I'm not really a single mom. He's there. I'm so thankful for him. Thankful that he provides for us. So that I can be home with our children.  And that this is where he wants me. 

I sat and drank my coffee and watched this little girl color. It was a beautiful morning. And I needed to soak it all in. To change my perspective. 

Life is good.